Nearing the end of 38 weeks.

Its crazy to think that I'm gonna be 39 weeks on Monday! 

I've been thinking it's time for another pregnancy update, mostly because for some reason writing it down is good for my sanity haha 

I have actually been doing really good the last few weeks! 

It's funny I feel like a month ago I was sooo miserable, and I just expected it to get worse, but instead I got a nice break! 

But I'm afraid the break might be over haha

Lately I haven't felt too bad but I have been SO. TIRED!!!

I'm sure it was like this with Micah too, but it wasn't

a big deal cause I would sleep in and take super long naps.

This time I get up when I'm forced to by Micah (who has been

getting up super early lately) and then I just try to stay awake until

nap time.  Honestly I don't always make it haha Curious

George is a life saver basically every day around here.

Sometimes I think, maybe today I'll stay awake during Micah's

nap so that I can get some alone time/ get something done. 

And then I decide its not worth it, sleep wins every time.

I remember the good old days when I had a couple hours to myself 

everyday.. Now I spend every possible moment sleeping. 

A nap used to get me through the day, but lately I'm just so tired I can't seem to do anything no matter what! Someone please tell

me I'll get my energy back after the baby is born!

I know it'll take a while.. Recovery and sleepless nights and all 

that, but I'm really looking forward to the day when I can 

at least function for a whole day.

Anyways enough about how tired I am (really I should be sleeping right now, but I'm rebelling cause it's the weekend haha I'll pay for it tomorrow)  So the weather has been super nice lately!! 

The first nice day me and Micah walked to the park.  

It was AMAZING! I have been dying to get outside and go for a walk.  But it didn't take long to realize that a turtle could beat me in a race ha I walk so slow! But its all good.  Also I had to take several breaks on what used to be a super short easy walk. 

That walk really wore me out and ever since I have been dying to get outside again, but I'm just so tired I can't even do it :( 

Oh pregnancy....

I have been craving cookies like crazy lately.  Cookies, Blue cheese salad dressing, and as of right now, a sandwich! Cravings are intense and I am starving most of the time.  Including the middle of the night.  Tired and starving with the rare desire and burst of energy to clean something is pretty much my life right now.

I have to remember to give myself a break lately.  I mean I'm like a week away from my due date. So being tired is pretty understandable.  For a while I would try and force myself to do stuff anyways.. But now I have just given in.  I try and sleep and relax as much as possible! I mean I'm making a human! haha

I feel like I can't deal with anything right now.  I have the hardest time making decisions or anything like that.  Basically I tell Matt he can decide and I'll just deal with whatever cause that sounds easier then making decisions at this point! 

Oh and I still haven't packed a hospital bad.. Why is it so hard?? I brought the bag upstairs and put like two things in it, but for some reason its like the one thing I just REALLY don't want to do.

Chances are I'll be packing my bag in between contractions haha

I'm getting really excited at the thought of not being pregnant soon.  I can't wait to eat all of the runny egg yolks, deli meats, hot dogs, and blue cheese dressing I want without worrying about it! I'm also pretty excited to not be sharing my body haha it'll be nice to be able to bend over and roll over in bed without dying.  

But even with how excited I am to not be pregnant I actually don't want this guy to come early!  We are all getting over colds and I feel like every baby in the world has rsv right now.  I know there will still be lots of stuff going around when he is born, but I'm hoping that at least we will be healthy when he comes.  

I had three cavities fill on Thursday.  That was fun.  not!  laying in the chair was so uncomfortable and I was having such a hard time breathing.  And then they would fill my mouth with stuff and it would be next to impossible to breath and I would just have to try so hard to stay calm and not freak out.  Longest hour and however many minutes of my life haha but I'm glad that they are fixed and that I won't have to worry about it after the baby is here. 

Well there you go.. a bunch of random thoughts about being 38 weeks haha I can't believe we will be a family of four soon!! EEeeeekkk! don't worry, I'm only mostly freaking out haha 

Real Life at 36 weeks

So I always try to take prego pictures on the rare 

occasion that I actually get dressed.. I am in sweats and 

Matt's biggest t-shirt most of the time and when

I do get dressed I get back into sweats as fast as 

humanly possible.. 

I realized today that I should take a picture of the every 

day prego me.. It's not pretty, but this is real life right now and one day when I'm not pregnant I'm probably gonna enjoy looking 

back and being like, "thank goodness that's over!" 

haha jk its not that bad.. kind of ha

Doesn't get much more real then this haha 

my sweats and the t-shirt that I wear basically ever single

day except for when I finally break down and wash it haha

it's the comfiest and one of the only t-shirts that still fits..

My messy house in the background, my hair that hasn't been washed, (or brushed) 

and my toddler that I never dressed 

because jammies are so handy and warm.  And I'm lazy and it's cold! 

I think the best part of these pictures is when Micah came into the room and saw me taking pictures he ran up to the mirror,  pointed and said oh! that's cute! hahaha I'll pretend he's talking about me.. Even though cute is about the farthest from what I feel right about now.

Well future self.. I hope you have things figured out with two kids 

and are able to start working out again and taking care of yourself..

But seriously. I miss working out! The plan was to work out till the day I had this  baby.. But I've had to resign myself to the fact that, that's just not going  to happen.  I can barely make it through a quarter of the things I'd like to do each day

without dying.. Let alone trying to work out haha

What do I mean by dying? Well when I do too much my stomach starts to feel  like it is literally going to split open.  Maybe that's normal, but it's painful and no fun!  My right hip starts to kill as if all the weight of this baby is on that hip alone haha

And the newest fun thing is my scar from my c-section BURNING!  Not a good feeling haha I called the nurse about that one (my first call to the nurse this pregnancy!) and she said as long as it doesn't start up again it's probably fine, but

to try and stay off my feet and take it easy for like three days. 

blahh So today I did the dishes and made some pancakes and by the time I got  done with that the burning was starting to come back.  So I have done a lot of sitting around since then

So all of those fun things happen, but I am just SO tired and emotional these days too.  And walking around and doing stuff isn't the only things my body can't handle.

I also can't sit for too long or lay down in one position for very long! haha!! It's so funny. Church last week just about killed me.. Seriously just trying to sit for three hours

took me the rest of the day to recover from ha 

Towards the end I started getting really emotional.  But hey church is a pretty good  place to cry.. Nobody will judge haha In my last meeting I missed Matt SO bad!! (he teaches primary the last two hours of church) plus I was cramping, and hurting,

and yea.. good times. 

At my last appointment they checked me for the first time and nothing is happening! Which is good.. We don't want anything to happen right now..  But it just goes

to show that all those braxton hicks really are good for nothing haha

But this sweet baby just kicks me all the time still and it brings me so much peace of mind!

Seems to be that he is healthy and happy in there and I'm so glad! 

I can't believe I'm so close to having this little guy!! 

Oh by the way he is definitely head down!! Yay!! I was thinking that he was, but two 

different midwives have confirmed it now.  

So sleeping.. That's been an adventure! I feel like 

I already have a newborn

because I'm usually up at least every four hours..

 Sometimes two haha And when I sleep for longer then that it's a miracle! Like last night I slept for like eight hours without getting up!!! So crazy. And awesome.  Some mornings I can't wait to get up just cause I'm hurting so bad.  

So far February is WAY colder and snowier then 

January was! I am so over 

winter.  A big part of it is that I feel so bad for Micah.  The cold combined with my pregnantness makes leaving the house really hard, and I feel like he probably gets so bored! I just wish I could at least let him go play outside in the yard.. 

but it has like two feet of snow and he refuses to wear his snow gear.  We went out to a little store the other day and he was grumpy and I can't really chase him around and loading him into the car is hard.. So yea I tried, but it was kind of a fail ha

So basically the point is that winter needs to end!!! but it doesn't look like it's even close to ending haha

I'm getting really excited to not be pregnant soon.  I know it will be a while before I'm recovered enough to do anything, but even going on a walk or taking Micah to a park sounds so amazing at this point!! haha 

Anyways there is a whole bunch of super random facts about life right now. Matt has been working some long days, due to a conference and so I think I just

needed somewhere to vent a little.  My blog is probably pretty good birthcontrol at this point!! haha It's all worth it though.  I wouldn't change being prego I'm just

so glad that I have the ability to be pregnant and that I can be a mom to these sweet boys!!

Sometimes complaining gets me through.. So I'm sorry for everyone that has to deal with that haha